REAL PERSON FANFIC

[thene]

fireholly99 5:07 pm
thene i am busy but i have a headcanon question to ask you and it cannot wait and the question is DOES OCELOT KNOW QUENTIN TARANTINO

athene1miranda 5:07 pm
huuuuuuuuuuuuuh well now
you'd think ocelot could get to know anyone he liked, right?
i mean, do you think he ever used to stalk western directors at all? or actors?
/thoughts of ocelot paying large sums of money to do horrible things to clint

fireholly99 5:09 pm
uh.
the worst part is, he would

fireholly99 5:09 pm
ocelot, i mean

athene1miranda 5:09 pm
he so would

fireholly99 5:09 pm
i'm just imagining him hiding in the bushes outside clint's house

athene1miranda 5:09 pm
with a noose

fireholly99 5:09 pm
and then eva comes over on her motorcycle to pick him up AGAIN
....i'm not sure ocelot is the type who would stalk actors, honestly.
he seems to value and enjoy the difference between reality and falsehood. it's what his career is based on.
i think he would stalk sergio leone, though.

athene1miranda 5:16 pm
ocelot has probably written a western script that he really wants sergio leone to make

fireholly99 5:16 pm
i want this fic

athene1miranda 5:16 pm
and it is terrible
really really terrible

athene1miranda 5:16 pm
clint wears an eyepatch and rules a secret nation in the desert

fireholly99 5:19 pm
ocelot swaggers in wearing his full classy cowboy cosplay gear, nothing not tasteful
ornamental spurs, modern suit, cute jewellery, historically accurate hat. he looks great.
he walks up to leone really really slowly and walks up to his desk and puts his foot on the table
and lifts his head
and hands leone the script, wordlessly

fireholly99 5:21 pm
and leone looks at it
and the first line is 'EXT: DESERT. EXTREME CLOSEUP OF CLINT EASTWOOD'S SWEET ABS'

athene1miranda 5:22 pm
I SEE.

fireholly99 5:22 pm
and we look at leone's face as he attempts to hide his genuine feelings
knowing ocelot has a gun

Comments

[crankyoldman]

I need this in my life. Seriously.

[zoeiona.livejournal.com]

*is rofling*

[1000kindsofrain.wordpress.com]

A quick question. Is this a vampire Sergio Leone, a zombie Sergio Leone, or an android simulacra of Sergio Leone? (BTW I'm currently listening to a Melvyn Bragg radio programme talking about Heraclitus and his views on identity.)

[thene]

I think it's simply Past Sergio Leone and that this scene took place sometime in the mid-1960s, but it's entirely possible that it's Vampire Sergio Leone or Zombie Cyborg Sergio Leone. Metal Gear is full of that kind of crack.